Friday, August 15, 2008

Cancer Scare Day 2

At first, it's easy to cope.

There's an edge of tears in my voice, but not too much. Just enough. I have Stuff To Do. I make phone calls. Assemble resources, marshal reserves. And the edge is there, just enough to make people listen a bit more intently, but not so much that they press for details. Something is up, they're sure of it. But what.

It's a few moments before we have to wake and clean and clothe Mama. I know her bed will be soiled with her own waste, I know that every move will be painful for her. And part of me wants to just let her be. (I won't and it's silly to think of it. But.)

What's the quote? About crisis and day-to-day living?

Coping. Harder today than yesterday, but coping.

6 comments:

Heather said...

I'm so sorry.

I wish I had something warm and wise that would give you a bit of hope or make you feel a little better...but all I know is that I'm here, thinking of you guys. I'm sorry.

serenity said...

*hug* I'm so sorry.

Hugs and love to you guys.

calliope said...

Thinking of you. I am so so sorry for all of this stuff happening all at once.

Bea said...

Don't try and cope too hard. You've got a lot to carry, and I'm sure you're under a lot of pressure to carry it all, and keep it all together. I guess what I'm trying to say is, sometimes coping means crying inconsolably for a little while. Sending you comforting thoughts.

Bea

Feliz Dianne Flutter said...

Oh Nica. I am so sorry. I will say a special prayer for Mama and the Kitty.

You and yours are in my thoughts.

Samantha said...

I'm sorry you've been overwhelmed with such a lot of bad news at once. Thinking of you.

And I do agree with Bea - sometimes crying is coping.